I have felt misunderstood my whole life. There....I said it! (Well, technically, I typed it, but in blogland that counts as the same!) Now before you start thinking this is gonna be a "Poor Little, Pity Me Post"...let me say...it is NOT. I don't play the victim well...unless of course, she is a character on stage! Those who know me on a more personal level can testify to the fact that I will "bust a gut" before I will ask for help or admit defeat! I cannot understand the whole "Damsel in Distress" senario? HELLO!!!!I HATE to look weak. It is likely a personality flaw...I know....but I am just being truthful!!
I am pretty much an open book. I love all people, and actually like most of them as well :) If I say something, I keep my word. If I do not like something, I will typically let you know in a private, kind way. It is just the way I operate. And despite my strong Southern Bell persona...I defy one presumed characteristic of that personality type.....Passive Manipulation. Where as many people I know tell you what you want to hear to get the reactions they want....I just don't play well using that set of unhealthy social rules!
Because of that...most folks, (in trying to figure out what I must really mean or really want)...totally do not get me....thus the saga of my life long experience of being misunderstood.
I suffered the emotional misfitting of this senario....without a true title or name or explination of it....until May 29, 2007. My wonderful husband took me to New York City for our 25th wedding anniversary, and had purchased front row, center tickets for "Wicked, the musical". Now, I realize that lots of folks love this Broadway show....but the experience was much more than theatrical enrichment to me. It was food to my soul. It defined feelings I had felt all my life that I had never been able to express adequately. The stuggles that Elphaba had, I could totally relate to....the way every deed she did was misunderstood....was familiar territory to me....I had walked those same roads of discontent and disconnection! For the first time, I got what the issue was with me...being missunderstood.....But the really cool part of this story is that along with the revelation of that truth, I also realized that it is OK. I'm OK.
Thankfully, with that new revelation/understanding, came the realization that I am only responsible for my own actions, my own feelings, and my own reactions. NOT for what other people think I mean...or what they presume I mean or want. As a counselor once told me....We each have our row to hoe (in regards to what we say, do or feel)....other folks are given their very own row....SO STAY ON YOUR OWN ROW!
I was reminded of this whole "Wicked Revelation" today as I booked tickets for the show again. I simply cannot go to NYC and not see it. It would be like not visiting family if I was coming home from being out of town. Elphaba is my "soul sister"....judged for her looks, her actions, her intentions, the backfireing of good deeds, etc.....she and I are one. And like Elphaba, and the common stuggles we share....as we experience life...laced with a little bit of grace....the love a good man...and the discovery of an inner strength (which for me is my relationship with My Heavenly Father)...I have learned to fly....and I have been changed, for good.
I hope in sharing this, that maybe somebody else out there that feels misunderstood most of the time....will not feel so alone. To quote Elphaba..."As someone told me lately, EVERYONE deserves a chance to fly"!
May you each glide gently on the wings of the ONE who intrically knitted you in your Mother's womb, who wired every little network of neurons that trigger your feelings, actions, and emotions...both good and not so good....With Him, you will never be misundertood.
Happy Flyin' Y'all!
~Miss Scarlett
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Our 25th Wedding Anniversay in NYC
Tuesday Morning Mammo Photo
Are you sure that is my boobie pic hanging up on that wall???
How Bountiful Are Your Gifts, Oh Lord!
Re-Honeymooners
On the beach at Litchfield
4 comments:
Have you read the book? I really liked it when it came out, but it is totally different than the musical. Much darker, not at all as inspirational. So I tell people who love the musical, they actually might not like the book. And I don't much like either sequel.
Carlos Frijoles
I did read the book....after I saw the show....and you are so right....the adaptation for the stage was MUCH different, and MUCH better :) The books are darker...less hope....I did not even finish "Son of a Witch"...and it is rare for me to not finish a book once a I start it!
Thanks for the post Carlos Frijoles...so glad our paths have crossed again!!! Still waiting on info about our...*GULP*....30th high school reunion!!!
great post! it is nice to be able to put a name on the feeling and especially great if it leads you to the realization of who God made you to be. i have not seen the show, but heard so much about it. thanks for the insight.
Okay Deb!
Momma's Homemade Vegetable Soup:
1-2 lb. groundbeef (lean): Brown in a large stock pot, drain if there is too much grease. OR You can take a Hambone with bits of ham still on it and boil it in water (My mom did it both ways, but my crew likes the beef based soup best.)
Add: A variety of vegetables! Frozen, cooked, canned, or fresh.
Typically I use:
1 can of diced roma tomatoes
1 lg. can of green beans
1 lg. can of veg-all
1 can cream corn
l can whole kernel corn
1 can red kidney beans
1 can Lesure peas
Carrots canned or fresh
Frozen or canned butter beans
Frozen or fresh brocolli
Various amounts and kinds of diced potatoes
Make sure to add enough water to make it a soup.
Add 1/2 cup Heinz Ketchup (More if you like the tomatoe base.) The sweetness of the ketchup also cuts some of the acid. Fresh diced potatoes neutralize the acid too if you tend to have acid reflux :)
Bring it to a full boil, then cook on low all day. Refridgerate when cool, and it is even better heated up the next day as leftovers!
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